Heavy Breeding

Bonus Essay Question

2008-11-15T15:28:00.000-08:00

We're soon heading back to the studio to begin demos for our next album. What do you think the next Matches record will be like? What do you want it to be like? Are your premonitions compatible with your wishes? Answer with complete sentences. Flip over your paper and put your pencil down when finished.

Post Your Scores

2008-11-12T14:18:00.001-08:00

PLAY HERE
PLAY HERE
PLAY HERE

Halloween Stills

2008-11-04T05:11:00.000-08:00

a marginal era rife with analogy

the tender box juggles itself down the beaten path; the abused path.

The neighbors in the grass all know what goes on when the tired tires come home.

Fell down the stairway to heaven. I'm sorry kid.

Sorry sport. champ. chimpanzee.

Provide for the future and an exit will be provided. March into the dark.

stand up. lie down. a day is a lifetime. be born. be burnt. born someday. sumday.

count them up. measure your amount.

The sheep's wool, shorn and waiting to be spun.

The boy is setting in the west.

A sure handshake. Lease me. Release me.

Heartcore vs. theMatches

2008-11-02T20:55:00.000-08:00

My friend Jimmy prints beautiful shirts. This is no exception. They're the kind that, brand new, feel like the hand-me-down Police tour shirt from '78 that you stole from your dad's closet. If you're lookin to rock new threads, click here.

There Is A Curse On Our Fingers

2008-10-29T11:26:00.000-07:00

In a maze of two by fours, confused by fog, and animated crudely by strobe lights, I really, truly was being hunted. I grabbed at Ben to tell him this wasn’t a gag anymore.
“We need to escape!”
He laughed,
“Yea, that dude scared the fuck out of me too! “
“No, Ben, seriously,” I moved my hand from his shoulder to grab more forcefully at his wrist. A bloody hand print stayed clutching his shoulder. Oh fuck. My stomach did a somersault. I swiveled my head around, finding the silhouette of a chainsaw-wielding Leatherface swelling as he approached to finish his kill.
“He’s for real Ben! He’s going to fucking kill us!”
Ben hooped with a mixture of fright and glee as a picture slid from the wall and a clown groped out at his neck. We were so dead.

Just strobes ago we’d entered the pig farm maze, leaping, running, and then clumping and cowering before the next bend in the path. As we moved, there was a constant struggle for the middle two of four spots. Our friend who’d invited us for a free haunt was taking a break from the register at the door to take me, Ben, and a girl we didn’t know through the house. Our friend was pretending to be scared to make us even more scared, and it was working.

Hopscotching through zombie hands that clutched at our ankles through cracks in the gates, we’d run straight into Leatherface, who, with choreographed lightning at his back, revved his chainsaw at our ankles. A hairpin turn in the path left me the unfortunate last of the pack. The blade swept high, meant to graze over my hair, but being a good head taller than the kid in the mask, I had to duck it, raising my hand to protect my face from getting whacked by, logic calmed me, a chain-less chainsaw. The machine struck the side of my hand, and I thanked myself for not taking it in the forehead. Though free of spinning blades, a heavy piece of industrial machinery could never be a pleasant thing to connect with the skull.

My group was rounding the next corner, and I jogged to catch up with them. Slightly shaken from my collision with the saw, I reminded myself that every boogie man and werewolf was just a high school kid getting paid minimum wage to hold a hatchet painted with red nail polish and grunt unintelligibly. I could still feel where the cold edge of the chainsaw had connected with my hand. My skin’s memory of the touch had turned warm. Damn, maybe I’d have a bruise. I was almost annoyed as I raised my arm, squinting in the dim light to see if it had left a mark. I should complain to my friend that they should be more careful. No, not complain, just say “hey, i don’t mind, but you should know.. You know, for next time. Because not everyone is as easy going as I am. You don’t want lawsuits... This isn’t me complaining. I’m telling you for your own good. You know, just have a talk with your staff... tell them, uh, chainsaws below the waist only. I mean, that’s still totally scary. Other than that though, I totally thought you did a great job. Yea, tell all of the high school kids in masks that they did a great job. Make sure you don’t just reprimand them, because overall, it was totally great. Just chainsaws below the waist, that’s all...”

The strobes burst back into effect, and from my fingertips, a line of red was splitting the distance to my elbow by halves with every flash of light. Fuck.

We were so dead. I had Ben by the wrist and was pulling him as he laughed like an idiot. He tried to twist free of my grip.
“Hold on, look at that guy in the stilts!”
I was saving his goddamned life and he had no clue. The saw’s motor had diminished to a mosquito’s buzz, lost in the bowels of the house, but I couldn’t be sure we were safe until we were back on the street. Who knew how many accomplices the chainsaw guy had in here... What a cover for a real psycho; sneak into a haunted house and amidst the fake gore and masked employees, get away with really hacking up some tourists. The exit in sight, running for dear life, I pushed the clown on stilts aside, Ben protesting in tow.

I highly recommend the Oklahoma State University Medical Center ER. The staff was courteous and professional. When I couldn’t wield the ball-point pen to fill out the necessary paperwork at the front desk, the triage nurse allowed me to squiggle a left-handed mark on the signature line, and while I got my blood pressure checked, she checked boxes for me. I joked that I could sign the contract in blood. It wasn’t the first time she’d heard the joke, but she laughed for me. They gave me a shot of Novocain and three stitches, and before an episode of Seinfeld had elapsed in the waiting room, I was good as pre-chainsaw.

By the time I got back to the venue, Bayside was just loading out their gear.
Everyone wanted to know, “what happened?”
I wanted to know what happened.

Best I can figure is that something inside a chainsaw whips around to spin the blades, and though that thing is not a blade, it is still doing 3600RPM’s and so even if it’s a blade of grass sticking out, it’s gonna make an argument for taking your finger.

Or maybe a real psycho masquerading as Leatherface in Tulsa narrowly let his victim escape to tell the tale.

Happy Halloween.

oxenoxen.com/blog.html

2008-10-07T15:29:00.000-07:00

Me and Emilee Seymour have an art blog, by the way, and it is here.

We're in need of a few titles yet, if you are inspired to submit copy in exchange for kudos.

Bayside tour begins tonight. Cleveland. Backstage looks like my high school's drama room. Secondhand, overly plush upholstery and lollipops in a dish. Someone's "Happy Birthday Dad" Costco cake is sitting sadly beside me. It says hi. It just asked me what a "blog" is.

-Shawn

A Proper Introduction

2008-09-25T21:21:00.000-07:00

Get Get Get Our Order Up

2008-09-10T23:56:00.000-07:00

If you go to the official youtube link here, there's an option right under the video to "watch in high quality". Do yourself right.
S

Hang The DJ

2008-09-05T02:48:00.000-07:00

This was my DJ set Tuesday night at the aptly named Harlot on Minna in SF.

Aptly named because of my sense of fashion on the night.

I woke to the joker’s face, not in a mirror, but a smudgy likeness grinning back at me from my mattress.

And of course, the
YANKEE IN A CHIP SHOP video

S

Official Yankee In A Chip Shop Video

2008-09-04T11:48:00.000-07:00

RIGHT HERE

Buzznet = Heroes

2008-09-01T14:24:00.000-07:00

Wednesday the 3rd-- Yankees on buzznet.com, exclusive!
In a huge way, Buzznet has gotten in touch with the London Metro Police and has sorted this all! They will host the video for the week of debut! Amazing. 1 week, 40 long distance phone calls, 34 Coke zeros, a missing manager, and a big toothy grin later, I can proudly say that the video will be released FOR SURE by the ever-so-lovely Buzznet on Wed the 3rd of September. Your patience has been golden and much appreciated.
Shawn

Marks/Scars/Other Details

2008-08-31T03:25:00.000-07:00

Summon the Wizard

2008-08-30T12:49:00.000-07:00

I am a liability. What a week for the Wizard to be gone... Some great ideas from you guys; parking lot screenings, megauploads, treasure hunts. It honestly wasn’t my most popular move on the business end, trying to upload the video myself. The Wizard comes into cel range tomorrow. We will do something. Promise.
S

Serious Bullshit

2008-08-29T10:14:00.000-07:00

Serious bullshit is going down. I’ve been on the phone all morning (I do mean morning-- try 5am) with our label and the London Metropolitain Police (our manager is out of town). I’m told that the “clip” Yankee in a Chip Shop contains footage of us “engaged in violating British law” and that our rights of dissemination are in question. Serious bullshit.
Public officers had taken our names during one incident on the shoot, which we kinda laughed off.. I seriously thought they were rent-a-cops. Apparently our files had been in processing, and had gotten investigated due to CCTV tapes of us running down the middle of the huge roundabout at Piccadilly Circus that was the video’s finale.
Funny thing is, Epitaph, who’s under pressure here, didn’t have anything to do with making the video at all. The only money spent on this video came out of my pocket-- I’d been saving up checks from art jobs just to shoot this second video for our new record-- one that there was no budget for in our recording contract, but that I was passionate about, and knew that people would be tickled to see. Epitaph didn’t even know we were making a video! When we brought back the footage, they were thrilled, and then totally got behind us-- helping us get great online coverage, and hopefully TV as well. Having them behind us gets our video and song much more potential coverage. Maybe instead I should have just slipped the thing online right when we finished it. Forgone the pomp and circumstance and just had the parade, tho be it smaller, before the red tape and roadblocks went up.
...The video is promotional and we’re not intending to make any money off of it. I just want people to see this video we shot. Fuck it. Here’s a link. I’ll gladly catch shit for this.

Friday! Yankees!

2008-08-27T18:07:00.000-07:00

We just sealed it-- The Yankee in a Chip Shop video will be rotating onto the front page of myspace for 7 whole days beginning Friday! That’s a huge deal considering that we shot this video totally run and gun while on tour in London. Our tiny budget was inversely proportional to the brassiness of the balls of all brave enough to be involved. When Emilee Seymour and I pitched the concept, there wasn’t a soul who thought all four of us band members would walk off the shoot without the aid of paramedics. London’s reputation is mean, and that is precisely what we were banking on. The video will be linked here! 10:30 am pst. Don’t be late!
S

Yankee = This Week!

2008-08-25T11:21:00.000-07:00

Better than Salty Eyes? Worse than Salty Eyes? You'll find out this week-- the Yankee in a Chip Shop video will be debuting online THIS WEEK. Check back here on the daily for a link to the Matches and Oxen's follow-up collaboration to Salty Eyes.

Look at me tryin to sound all official...what I really mean to say is "Me and my friends made something neat! Be excited with us!!"

(and yes, of course Micheal Coleman, the man behind the camera, was using "worse" as in "my head hurts more now than before". I just can't refrain from fanning flames under any cauldron of shit.)

'til not soon enough,
Shawn

A Band In Hope Payment

2008-08-15T10:43:00.000-07:00

Dave Smallen from Street to Nowhere makes good on his burned copy of ABIH:

Post us video responses on youtube or send to the sharpied email on the cardboard box.
wink. nudge.
Shawn

NYC Spin book club charity event

2008-07-23T02:21:00.000-07:00

If ya live in NYC, you're luckier than I. There'll be a limited pressing of a screenprinted poster I'm currently designing at the event.

http://livefromhome.org/events/ for tickets, and scroll on down.
S

A Justin SanSouci Retrospective

2008-07-21T01:48:00.000-07:00

DJ Juicestache crackin us up on a long van haul.

Pushing in vain to free us from a snowdrift at 2am in the Canadian Rockies.

White Sands, NM sand sledding

Bloody Knuckles. Fender wins.

Courtney Love and child

Justin servin up nachos just like the old days on the clock back at the Warfield and Fillmore. Except this time, we’re onstage. First show at the Warfield, opening for Less than Jake. Fall Out Boy was support.

Naptime

pre-touring days-- some house party near UC Berkeley, CA

first Warped Tour

youngans

Yankees

We had some damn fun times. Best of luck. We love ya.
Shawn

Say Graceburger

2008-07-17T15:28:00.000-07:00

Wayne, UK Matches fan extraordinaire, at our acoustic show in SF last night with his pant leg hiked up for all to see the great Musburger in ink, sheepishly asked "What does it mean?" I had to laugh. Musburger is on our guitar picks, and keeps us safe from his perch on the rear view mirror in the van, and legend has it that he even pilots our bus after we all pass out. But like the holiday moral of the cliche Christmas stories, Musburger is about so much more.
So if we could all join hands and perhaps bow our tongues into our cheeks, I would like to go around the table and have everyone say what Musburger means to you...

Fillmore Auditorium, Tech Difficulties, Attention Center Mic

2008-06-21T11:49:00.000-07:00

Alright, alright, now I know I was going on about some dream... (which by the way, wasn't even my dream! It was Monaca our merch girl's dream that I overheard her telling at dinner, which I misinterpreted to be a punchline-less joke. I told her she was a horrible comedian, to be corrected, "no! That was my DREAM!") So when my guitar pedal short circuits on stage and someone yells "tell a joke", immediately the first joke that springs to my mind is Monaca's dream, which is not at all a joke. And agree, you can't go telling someone else's story in front of a thousand people, so I lie it my own, and Monaca is up on the balcony shouting "that's MYYYY dream!" And I'm trying to tune her out and get through it, and I can't remember the details, and then I realize that the dream is about getting the manager of plus44 to smoke pot, and looking at Monaca, I see my grandma beside her, and so I think I throw in some disclaimer about it JUST being a dream, or maybe that it's not MY drugs, or something to ease her mind that the money in the birthday card she's about to give me isn't going to be spent on the corner of Broadway and 20th.
It's a blur in my memory, and I did notice there's a clip of it on youtube, which I can't bare to watch. By the way, I was looking for clips of the performance, and ALL that I find the day after is this dream clip?! Priorities people! Really? I know the person who posted that video must have more of the show! The music! But no, we are sadly defined by the stupid shit we do when we hope nobody is paying attention.

Yet however loose-screwed some of the shit is that falls out of my mouth, and as hazy as those memories return, there are some things I just don't think I would forget. Take the following for example, which came to Ben Triangle Man Young via email for a fact-check. Anyone have a video of this happening on stage?

--
OK, I hate to be the bearer of "bad" news, but I think you should know this.
Shawn's NOT the single guy in the band. At all. At the Fillmore show last
Saturday, he pointed out his girlfriend to the audience; she was sitting in
the VIP balcony with his parents.
Here's the kicker: it's , my daughter. Seriously. They've been
together awhile but kept it under wraps for lots of reasons I'm sure you'd
understand. But he put their relationship out there...to the point that a
radio station in Tucson commented that he'd introduced his girlfriend at the
show. (She was incredibly embarassed, by the way! But that's Shawn.)
Shawn is the reason is in San Francisco for a month. Because the band
is "off" they have LOTS of time together, which is so hard when they're
touring.
They're pretty serious, and I figured you should know. I'm staying
off the boards just now, but I bet they're talking SOMEWHERE about how
everyone now knows who "Doll" is.
Don't hate me for keeping quiet. It was important at the time. And nobody
can blame you for wanting Shawn, the Pretty Boy Harris! LOL He's a marvelous
man. This from 's mom...moms never think anyone's good enough for
their child...but I really think he is.
Write back and let me know how this went over, cause I want to stay friends
with you, my International Child. :)

New Works

2008-06-19T14:38:00.000-07:00

in piles.
here
-oxen

Them Fillmore Apples

2008-06-17T10:41:00.000-07:00

Thank you thank you for making June 14th 2008 the best day imaginable.
Love,

Chip Shop Chop Shop

2008-06-08T11:47:00.000-07:00

Emilee and me in the paper world that ties London together in the Yankee In a Chip Shop video. It was another one-take fiasco, a la Salty Eyes, at least on the budget we were shooting- there was no affording double prints even, of the paper models we were destroying. And again, it worked out- by the skin on our eyeballs.

Great Success Zooming

2008-05-28T22:39:00.000-07:00

All time favorite translation fumble: from the Japanese movie poster for "Legally Blonde 2" with Reese Whitherspoon, released in Japan titled "Cutie Blonde Happy Max".

Off to the Mori Tower to see some art. Finishing Zebrahead's new artwork this week, and just wrapped up There For Tomorrow, Abandin All Hope, finishing Biffy Clyro's single (which'll be released on vinyl which is badass, and the song is even more so), and just sent off a 16x22 3 color poster to Bloom press in Oakland that'll be a hand screened limited edition bit of art for sale at the June CA run of shows, culminating in our hot date with the Fillmore in SF on the 14th. the show flier is a tiny segment of the whole.

From Tokyo with love and seaweed breath, which are not generally bedfellows,
S