Setting: BFD Live105 radio festival show in N. California.
The Gist: A girl who had flown from afar to come see our band comes to the conclusion that her best bet at becoming a staple part of my life is to woo my father away from my mother and marry him- legally becoming my stepmother. Amusing ploy, but better, she begins to deploy her offense! I was in disbelief. She was doing that "stand too close/grab arm/accidental boob brush" routine while he uncomfortable sidled back, repeatedly, into his own personal space. My mom and he were one part miffed, two parts oblivious.
Outcome: Wake with rock neck from hairlessly headbanging to Queens of the Stoneage. No relation to above story, just a lazy segue to my story's conclusion.
The Gist: A girl who had flown from afar to come see our band comes to the conclusion that her best bet at becoming a staple part of my life is to woo my father away from my mother and marry him- legally becoming my stepmother. Amusing ploy, but better, she begins to deploy her offense! I was in disbelief. She was doing that "stand too close/grab arm/accidental boob brush" routine while he uncomfortable sidled back, repeatedly, into his own personal space. My mom and he were one part miffed, two parts oblivious.
Outcome: Wake with rock neck from hairlessly headbanging to Queens of the Stoneage. No relation to above story, just a lazy segue to my story's conclusion.
59 Comments :
-giggle- =)
Hey now, perhaps she genuinely liked your dad, not just because he was YOUR father.
I doubt it though..
How awkward for you XD
WHAT
wow.
a bold, though bizarre, approach.
the girl's got gusto.
christ.
how many bizarre marriage proposals would you say you receive?
Woke up in a bucket seat, Headed west...had people to see, ...
a magnificent view, I was held in Awwe,
Like a good neighbor, trying to be, heed this tip and please
embrace...
this toast to The Matches and their Exceptional young host,
best wishes I shout and Cheers to you...
Curtsies...
until next time, shake, shake, ...
please lead the way
music maestro...
and this I extend...
just dont underestimate...certainly consider
the sum of me..
Unbelievable Reasoning
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And it took me that long to say something...Hahaha.
She was serious? That's a little strange but I guess you should give her credit for trying.
Have a super spiffy day!
Well now that's the most logical plan I've heard of in a long time!! Of course that statement comes with a large side order of sarcasm. I hope you're flattered by such sentiment.
And i hope your neck gets better soon, because its a pain in the ass after a show and you have to turn your whole body to speak to somebody because your neck has been immobilised for a week. Anyhow, hope the rest of the tour goes swimmingly. =) xo
I like how you described it: "stand too close/grab arm/accidental boob brush." that makes me laugh, because I remember using that ploy before. ha.
I was there to witness the whole thing. It was interesting to say the least. She was very determined. haha Your parents were very nice, too bad they had to deal with that.
Also, my apologies for Jessica and I's drunken harrassment. It was all in good fun. Don't worry we have no schemes up our sleeves.
Now that's dedication.
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AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
There are no other words-honestly. I have no idea what to say.
Odd, I'm thinking to myself if a guy liked me so much that he starts making eyes at my mother, haha, that's a hoot!
maybe... i would be a little frightened... but maybe your father is in awe... you sound like you had plenty of fun :)
hahahaha DILF. how uncomfortable.
hey... i'd do it...
i'm kidding?
Bitch stole my idea, dammit...
In all seriousness, though: HA.
I love fangirls and their scheming. As long as I don't have to put up with it. And you do, so my deepest sympathies.
HAHA WHAT?!
interesting approach.
I'll see you in 24 days and you can bet that you'll be safe from any tactics or plans to become a relative of yours.
oh and uh, how old was this girl hitting on your dad?
Oh goodness, I would feel so akward
Your poor, poor father
I even feel bad for your mother!
so i guess trying to woo you with cookies wasnt gonna work.... hahah just kidding
how very...flattering. O_o;
Ah, the infamous "stand too close/grab arm/accidental boob brush". It might be ulimate fan girl scheme: always annoying, painfully funny and sometimes just a little pathetic. Thought I think that the whole 'Dad' thing might be a little much. And by 'a little' I mean it might be the most absurd thing I've ever heard, not to mention extremely creepy and awkward. That girl has amazing problem-solving/reasoning skills.
Wish I had a lazy segway.
You know. One of those weird scooters, only it would never take you anywhere, it would just sit on the couch and watch daytime soaps and tell you "it has this amazing job lined up, you'll see, just give it another week."
If she really did fly
out to see you guys, shit
she might as well get
her money's worth.
wow...
if some overly obsessed guy were to go so far as to hit on my mother...
i'd flip the shit.
i could definately picture someone like that in a camofage jumpsuit with a safari hat hiding in some nearby bushes and peering out ever so stealthily. *shiver*
Haha... that anonymous comment is the best.
"One of those weird scooters, only it would never take you anywhere, it would just sit on the couch and watch daytime soaps and tell you "it has this amazing job lined up, you'll see, just give it another week." "
I have to ride a segway at my work. It doesn't really seem to be the soap opera type. Talk shows, maybe...
at least she tried hitting on your dad and not your mom?
On a side note it's highly impressive that your parents are still together (even after Crazy McLoony tried to stealy your father away)...def a rare thing to come across, I just assumed my parents were just about the only ones left.
Wow...
Maybe she drank some Chlorox, because I don't know what else could induce such a winning scheme in someone's mind.
Your poor father, mother and self.
Was she at least hot? ;-)
hahahahahahaha
hahahahahahaha
omgsh.
I nearly peed just then.
haaaaaaaaaaaaaha. i foudn her myspace
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=6554642
ooooooops here it is
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=6554642
fuck that shit one more time for the doods in the back. if this doesnt work, go find it yourself.
www.myspace.com/6554642
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Can't wait to see y'all at warped tour!
ahahahaha, Katie is retarded. I'm sure you can't wait until Warped Tour takes you to socal so you can see her again :)
I hope that is a telling dream, or else a premise for a new song or video. Otherwise I can't help feeling bad for a woman who thinks such a misguided effort will result in some sort of modern-day Oedipus scenerio...
WOW!!! I thought I was bad with my plots to meet Johnny Depp!
A. Become terminally ill before I turn 18 (unfortunately not so much time left) so I can meet him through the make a wish foundation.
B. Work at the catering for the wedding he is supposedly having this summer in France. I just need to get a job at the catering business and learn French.
C. Be an extra on one of his movies. I need to make sure that he will definitely be in the scene that I will be in though.
D. Cause myself to be "accidentally" shipwrecked on his island.
E. Step on a rusty nail like his daughter did so he may have a little bit more sympathy and come see me in the hospital. (Not one of the best!)
At least I never actually went through with any of those! Well there still is time. That is still very creepy though. At least I know I have a problem.
Yes, you mean segue, not segway.
Johnny Depp anonymous, if the woman is crazy enough to steal Shawn's dad, what makes you think she doesnt read his blog? don't give her any ideas.
hahaha
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confidence is key... i don't condone hooking up with parents, weird, but at least she tried SOMETHING and it was somewhat of a different approach.
i would get bored of, "hey shawn, i wanna have your babies..."
not gonna lie... ha.
<3
maybe all she wanted was to get Shawn's attention, and she definitely did. even tho that is one messed up way of going about it...
I think that's the most effed up thing I've ever heard. Almost. Want me to beat her up?
1. thank you word checker for appropriate spelling of segue, which I will now change in my original post, making the amusing author of the couch ridden scooter-type segway a mad genius, or terribly off topic.
2. the myspace. I want no part in confirming or denying the perp. But let it be known that points are secretly being awarded for creativity, and whoever this girl is has a gold star in at least that category.
3. a DILF?!? Ha!
4. my parents have by now found the link to this blog. (though they annoyingly double-click the banner, no matter how many times I tell them they just need to single click it) I do wonder how much of this story they had registered at the time, as we have not spoken about the event yet..
Shawn
lol funny. both the story and the reply.
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If I had a nickle every time my mother double-clicked something I told her to single-click, I would be in a very fortunate position.
In Katies defence.....
I forceed her Caption Morgans cos she had never drinkin before.
And the truth came out that she likes old men....
(not saying that your dad is old)
And again...
I really hope you didnt get offended she just jokes about stuff like that a lot.
So far she is "going out" with my younger brother, our frineds mom and your dad.... and her real boyfriend.
I really hope she didnt make you family uncomfertable, she is just extremily friendly with everyone she meets.
and how did you find her myspace?
"she likes old men....
(not saying that your dad is old)"
yeahhhhhhh.
that's actually exactly what that
statement implies.
excellent diction.
i commend you.
at least shawn knows and remebers who the fuck i am! and they will be playing at my 21st birthday! thanks to my rich dad! :)
p.s. i was drunk of my ass!
Now that's definietly the Electra Complex... only for someone else's dad because of the child produced. That's really screwy.
I think if I liked someone, I would not go for their father. Basically, the father would be old enough to be my father and that's just wrong.
<3
btw just be glad it didn't work
xo
what part of her being drunk and not REALLY hitting on his dad does anyone not get? offisouly we have some really intelligent people here....
Haha I must say to witness this must have been both awkward and amusing. So how does it feel to be loved and idolized so much that people are now after your father? Haha :) I love you but I cant say that I would want to be your stepmom because then I would be in love with my stepson and thats just crazy.
While I was writing this I heard Papercut Skin in the backgroud and I turned around to see the video on Fuse's Warped Wednesday! Just thought I'd tell you that ironic little tid bit of information.
Love you!
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